Dear Ramji

What a very nice surprise. Your treatise on Kundalini did remove the veil, made an end on my confusion and was a better and more comprehensive answer than I could have expected and hoped for. It is very clear. It produced for me not only peace of mind, but it also gave me a much deeper understanding of what is going on inside me and in the world around me. It is beautiful how straight and down to earth you can put things and bring them into the right perspective: no mystical language; no vague and cryptic arguments; just simple the eternal truth. I feel very grateful. I feel myself blessed to have the privilege to know you and to listen to your teachings. May God bless you for that.

After reading your letter and viewing your photographs, for which great thanks, my next meditation was very special. The real value of your gift unfolded itself in my meditation. My body and mind became very peaceful and quiet. Then it was as if my mind became illuminated. It was clear as crystal and quiet as the moon shining bright. I try to be as open as I can in my meditation with no expectations and without longing for repeated sensations yet it is still going on at the moment. I am increasingly able to see the mind making trouble and myself staying quiet and willingly watching this. Now if I close my eyes it becomes light instead of dark, not only in meditation, but also in normal situations.

Afterwards I did sleep. And when I woke up there was that strange moment of awakening. Suddenly I realized that I was aware of my mind being completely empty. I think it is what you call "a blank mind." I saw that. And I was aware of the fact that I was aware of it. I don't exactly know if the awareness of the awareness was something I did remember later on or if it happened simultaneously but I do know that at that moment I felt free of and apart from my mind. It was very quiet and peaceful. In India I had roughly the same experience. There it felt as if I were somewhere out in the universe, far away. Now it was as if I was in my body and mind, though watching it from a distance.

Experiences comes...and goes…as you said. That's true but I had difficulties placing it in context. Now your saying: "experiences are of value for the knowledge you gain out of them" gives me the right framework. In that light my spontaneous experience of being not my mind is of great value because it was so obvious and without any suspicion of intellectual manipulation. It is so natural and basic that I can only accept it as a nugget out of the goldmine. In that it has similarity with you.

There is a lot more to say, but this is what I wanted you to know for now. It seems as if the Shakti also flows through the wires of the World Wide Web.

I was happily surprised by your invitation to visit. It would be wonderful and valuable for me. But, at the moment, it is not possible (easy to do). Later on we will talk about that, but don't worry, there is not a problem. Indeed you are very welcome to visit us and to stay with us. We will see who comes first.

Ramji, for now Thanks a lot, you have done a great job.

Love

Harry

Dear Harry,

I could base a whole book on this wonderful letter on one hand but on the other it is completely self explanatory because it is the truth. One comment I could make is that this shows how clear understanding can lead to deep realization. It shows how when you have devotion for a mahatma and faith in the words of Vedanta and humbly inquire into the meaning of the words, the words become alive and produce discrimination.

Several items should be mentioned. First is the fact that the ‘light' is on whether or not the eyes are open or closed. Awareness, you, is unblinking and eternal. Second is your statement “I am increasingly able to see the mind making trouble and myself staying quiet and willingly watching this.” This confirms in a very practical way scripture's statements concerning the relationship between the Self and the (Self as) mind. The mind is the trouble-maker. One needn't necessarily try to prevent the mind from making trouble at this stage but should be very clear what the mind is and why Vedanta says the mind is ‘not you.' When it is very clear what the mind is and how it does not have your best interests in mind, then you can set out to educate it about the Self if you wish… but this takes a long time and is optional. It is optional because if you know what the Self is and you keep your attention on it, always discriminating in favor of the Self over the mind, the mind will eventually shrink to a very small voice, one that you can hardly hear. Once it has shrunk it is easy to educate. It will before long begin to identify with the Self and the degree to which is does, to that degree it will remain calm and peaceful.

The third item that caught my attention was your realization of the empty or blank mind. This empty or blank mind is the Self, Awareness, free of thoughts. Then you say you were aware of Awareness. This means that there is only one Awareness and it is self aware. It is not only aware of itself as the mind/ego but it is aware of itself. The perception was simultaneous, not serial. It sometimes seems that you realize this later but it happens all at once.  The important thing to remember is that you are always far away from your mind. Even when your relationship with the mind is not so experientially distant as it was during this insight, the knowledge that you are far away from the mind will insulate you from disturbances in it. The only true freedom lies in knowledge because knowledge is constant. Experience, how close or far you ‘feel' with reference to the mind or the mind as Self, is inconstant. If you pin your hopes on always ‘experiencing' the mind from the outer space viewpoint you are going to be unhappy. But if you realize that Self/mind knowledge is the outer space viewpoint you will be always free.

Finally, it is so important to understand the value of knowledge relative to the value of experience. Ninety nine percent of people value experience first and knowledge second. This is a source of great suffering. You are always weak and insecure when you value experience over knowledge because you basically have no control over experience. The vasanas make sure of that. But knowledge is something that protects you from change and suffering. If you live by your knowledge you will be always free because it neutralizes your vasanas. I was an alcoholic when I was young. Even today I remember many of the most wonderful and incredible experiences I had when I was intoxicated. And even today, almost forty years later, I am sometimes offered a drink when I go to somebody's house for dinner and I notice that for a brief second there is a mild desire to experience this pleasure. But knowledge has happened. One day I realized that when you consider pleasurable experience you need to factor in the pain, in this case the hangover. People who are stuck with a bad habit discount the pain and remain fixated on the pleasure. It is a recipe for disaster. So if a desire arises in my mind the knowledge about its nature arises simultaneously and neutralizes it. Ignorant people argue that life is not worth living without desire. They foolishly and romantically imagine that they are really living when they are being buffeted about by all the ups and downs that living for experience brings. But they are wrong. They only love their desires when they are being fulfilled. When they are unfulfilled…and it is the nature of the mind that what is fulfilled will be equally unfulfilled…they will pray to God to save them from their cravings.

Anyway, these are Sri Ramji's sage comments. It is nothing new but it is good to hear it over and over. Take care of yourself.

Love,

Ram