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A Conspicuous Feature
Seeker: Hi, James. Congratulations on your wonderful marriage, I am so happy for you because you seem to be quite delighted by it and whatever delights you also delights me. I continue to be filled with a deep affection for you as I never have in this way before with a teacher. I always wondered about the celebrated love one feels for their “guru” and wondered if I would ever have some direct appreciation for the why and how of it. Now I do. It seems like the most natural thing in the world to feel beholden and grateful to the person who has given you the knowledge that puts into place a lifetime of valid yet piecemeal information. Vedanta is like the catalyst that causes the unstoppable chain reaction, the curdling agent in the milk. Once it is introduced, nothing in heaven or on earth can bring it to a halt. It then becomes (as it seems to me) merely a matter of time for the mechanics of it to reach fruition. But from the start there is a conspicuous feature that assures you, once and for all, you are on the right path. That conspicuous feature is CONFIDENCE! That confidence is like a fire that burns away silly false notions, self-pity, blame and in general the illogical fallacies hidden within idle thoughts.
Also, what has been liberating is the eliminating of the false notion that if I’m really making “spiritual progress” I shouldn’t ever be groggy or grouchy or absent-minded or lazy, etc. I thought I was supposed to stay energetically focused on the self all the time, but staying “focused” as well as feeling groggy are merely experiences within the arena of unconcerned awareness – which is me. The one who is trying to stay focused is an object of perception, and when you see how so many spiritual people have made a religion out of “mindfulness” it becomes so utterly and hilariously clear just how much they are missing the very point they are beating themselves up to get! It reminds me of that Bugs Bunny cartoon where Elmer Fudd has his rifle and is looking for Bugs because he wants rabbit stew. Bugs is hanging over his shoulder munching a carrot, making suggestions to Elmer that maybe he should look behind that tree or behind those bushes over there, and Elmer is seriously following his advice!
I have no complaints or existential problems. Time will tell of course but, James, I don’t think I will ever have such things again. Not in this life anyway.
With love, great affection and gratitude!