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A Small Act of Love
Dick: Dear Ramji, I would like to ask your advice on “hard and fast knowledge” regarding a recent event.
When frustration happens, more and more I am able to observe it from the idea of the self and it does indeed shrink. I thought this would be only possible in my – “svadharma” – but in a recent tiff with my wife, she was clearly frustrated with me (can’t remember why), I suddenly noticed the same thing suffering in her now, as if in me. It was like watching exactly the same thing I watch with this suffering going on around it and yet no difference. I leant over and, despite all wriggling tendencies in me not to do so, kissed her in a “I love you anyway” – not sarcastically – but from knowing that it is nothing, meaningless for us both, at which she went all quiet.
If at some time… and I pray this may one day be so… the knowledge becomes so hard and fast and constant – then it surely must benefit others, not just oneself? Even if those others have never heard of Vedanta?
Ramji: Yes, indeed, Dick. There is only one self. She is not your wife nor her emotions nor an ordinary person. She is actually the self. If you relate as the self it bypasses the ego and the self responds in kind. It has no choice. There are more than one hundred people here, none of whom I can say that I know personally, yet almost all of them love me. Why? Because I relate to them as the self. They have no choice but to relate to me as the self. The self is love, manifest in your small act of uncoerced willing attention. That small act was immediately recognized by the self as coming from the self. If you smile at a tiny baby it will smile back even though you are a complete stranger to it. Why? Because you are not a complete stranger. The self in it recognizes the self in you. When you think “my wife, etc.” you invoke the dualistic program and Isvara gives you duality back. It has nothing to do with Vedanta, apart from the fact that if you “take a stand” as the self – as Vedanta recommends – it will heal the emotion in play at the moment. Even though I have no job and a $500-a-month pension from the government I live like a king because I am The Bill Gates of Love. I relate to everyone with love and they have no choice but to love back. So the world looks after me. This love transforms the world, no doubt about it. It grows and grows as it fans out into the hearts of all you touch.
~ Much love, Ramji
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