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This Relationship Is Too Much, I Quit
Well, at least I had a taste of what it is like to be grounded in the self. For about thirty hours I lacked nothing and nobody. A state of clarity surrounded me. I came down to samsara with a thump when yet something else came up in regard to John. I have decided to let go of him completely, even as friends. It is all too hard and too emotional. You mention in your “Gunas” DVD that we need to stay away from tamasic and rajasic people and surround ourselves with sattvic ones. You are right. I know this is not what he wants but I need to do what is best for my spiritual journey. I need a clear mind to be able to respond appropriately to whatever life presents me at each moment and I can’t while he is in my life. I become too emotional, too angry, too irrational. I know these are things I need to work with but I need a clear mind to do it.
So please, Ram, what now? I am listening to your DVDs (again, thank you so much for them). I am contemplating the ideas you present in them. I won’t bother to meditate until I have a calmer mind. How do I start working on my problems, jealousy, anger, possessiveness, insecurity, etc? You say in The Gunas that we must go into the attic and clean it out. Could you tell me how? I am going to continue attending the Vedanta Friday night talks even though John is going to be there. Vedanta wins in this case. I am determined to learn how to live in the self continuously, no matter what the sacrifices. I need your guidance. Thank you, Ram, I would not here if not for Vedanta. And you are a great proponent of this marvelous teaching.
Ram: You start with the karma yoga attitude. It removes the samskaras that cause negative emotions. Watch the Karma Yoga video and read the discussion of karma yoga in my book, and if you have problems understanding it write to me.