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It’s Always on You
Seeker: Dear James, I am sorry that somehow I involved you in my relationship problem, but since we have been talking about it, things are getting more clear. I have decided to stay with Mary in spite of the fact that she continually expects me to resolve her feelings. In the end and, of course in the beginning, relationships are only about love and love has nothing to do with feelings. So thank you for helping me through this. You won’t hear anything about it from now on.
James: Yes, spirituality is very simple – love. I’m glad you are leaving the relationship in place. Love is free of demands and complaints. You are the only person who can give you want you want. Mary loves you but her jiva can only express it according to its nature. Most people find it difficult to express their feelings without guilt, because feelings – positive and negative – can easily be disruptive and social harmony is absolutely essential. For example, if you fall in love with someone who is married, it is not wise to show your feelings, because the context in which you express them makes them disruptive. That you should be particularly careful expressing negative emotional content is obvious. Inquiry is basically the only way to relationship success because it throws everything back on you. Inquiry is based on the hard and fast belief that the objects in one’s field are value-neutral, which means that satisfaction and dissatisfaction with your situation is purely a JIVA problem. It isn’t about the world at all. It’s about how you see yourself. Always!
~ Much love, James