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Kevin: Hey, James. Thanks for the reply.
I think the enlightenment sickness thing is about over. Discrimination was something I did from birth, for whatever reason, and the habit has never stopped, even after I became one of the walking dead.
I and my current email buddies (I have no actual friends, just some email buddies) who seem to know the secret handshakes of living as awareness do have one issue that we all go “around” on some… that being, how to live without any desire or need to do anything? Now, my hippy-dippy friend has more years of not napping… I think he’d be fine staring at a blank wall… the other two of us (myself and the lady doctor) are somewhat at a loss of how to live while dead… but we are new-deads (sort of a joke). I imagine it will all come together.
James: I hope so. Perhaps what I am about to say will irritate you, Kevin, but please think about it before you flame me. ☺ If you are living as awareness you will not have this question, because living as awareness means that there is no problem living with desire. The self is the desire that is not opposed to dharma, to quote the Bhagavad Gita. Desire is awareness, but – and here is what frees you from it, as it appears in you – you are not desire. Living as awareness does not mean that Kevin is living as awareness, it means that awareness is living as Kevin. Awareness has no email buddies nor does it have doubts about what to do once Kevin and his buddies are members of the enlightenment club and know the secret handshake. “It lives without breathing,” to quote Atma Bodh. The idea that desire and awareness are incompatible is not correct. It is as old as the hills (think Buddha and the hopeless quest for nirvana). Awareness has no problem with anything, including ignorance of awareness. The problem, as I see it and as I mentioned in my last email, is that the Kevin-guy could use some noble, uplifting work. Perhaps he is a bit needy, a bit lonely, etc? Knowing who you are does not miraculously change your life in the world. Karma does not know that you are enlightened. Additionally, when the knowledge, “I am awareness,” is firm the “what to do now that I am enlightened?” doubt does not occur, because the knowledge negates the doer, the one with the questions. The problem lies in the popular concept of enlightenment, which formulates liberation as some kind of experiential situation – living as awareness. There is some truth to it, but it is not the truth, unless you understand that awareness lives without breathing. Adyashanti published a book called The End of Your World. It is an attempt to tell egos who got enlightened what issues they face when they are enlightened. If enlightenment is enlightenment, it means that there are no issues – because you are awareness. But almost none of the enlightened know how the awareness that they are relates to the doer, the one with desires. Yes, gratuitous desires for ephemeral worldy things will not be there, but the desire that is not opposed to dharma will be there.
It is there in you as a desire to help your email buddies. It is a noble desire. Unfortunately, helping the world to enlightenment takes more than liberation. It takes self-knowledge because self-knowledge is enlightenment. And self-knowledge is a lot more than the experience of a particular enlightened person. You need an impersonal, time-tested means of knowledge. You need the temperament of a teacher and you need to be able to wield the means skillfully. Otherwise you will just confuse people or end up commiserating with them.
Anyway, thanks for the offer to be a source for me. If the truth be told, I am The Source, not a big-teacher-dude. It is just a role I play from time to time. My energy is limitless and I am never bored. I love James, and I make sure he is happy every minute. I am totally Selfish.
~ Much love, awareness masquerading as James