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Vasana-Bombs and the Adorable Pet
Rye: Dear Daniel, I hope you are well.
Wow! I just survived a massive vasana attack.
I have been ruthlessly reviewing this jiva’s life and facing some unpleasant facts about past behaviour.
The last couple of nights I have woken up with panic and self-loathing.
I have been applying the knowledge like a maniac – talk about faking it!
Suddenly this afternoon the mist seems to be clearing.
I am so grateful to you, Christian, Ramji and Sundari! Thank you for your unstinting optimism.
I know you have your own troubles and I pray that they pass.
Daniel: Brotherji, it delights me to hear your soldier-like attitude. This is exactly the attitude it takes to battle and dissolve these vasana-bombs.
Though ol’ Isvara may come across as a bit of brute at times, he sure offers the apt training ground. What a prasad!
Stick with knowledge, it will never let you down.
Sword up and forward we march!
Rye: Dear Daniel, thinking further on this, I think it is revealing the ego to me.
Daniel: Brilliant. Check how you’ve kicked the ego to its rightful place (into the object pile) and have taken a firm stance as awareness.
Rye: There is a great struggle to decide: Am I a good man or a bad man?
Daniel: Neither. You are the knower/awareness of the “good man/bad man” thought. But I know you know this already.
I also know that you’re speaking from Rye’s limited view, so my response to this doubt – as always – is that Rye needs to fearlessly flex that self-forgiveness muscle and get over it. Let bygones be gone. No need to carry dead weight, sir. It does not serve you or the situation. Let go and lovingly step forward. Give yourself full permission to do so – even if it feels strained.
Isvara needed your jiva to behave in a certain way at a particular time, nothing personal about it. Rye had no choice but to helplessly dance like a puppet according to the strings of the Total. So if you need to blame something, then blame Isvara.
Rye: Irrelevant ultimately, but very clear to see.
Daniel: Yes – totally irrelevant: both to you, awareness, and to the jiva – the “new” dharmic Rye – who IS a good guy with just a few shitty thoughts still squatting around.
Rye: The mind wrestles back and forth looking for a resting place, which of course it cannot find.
Daniel: The mind totally depends on you, awareness. Sit it down and instruct it to take it a seat in the knowledge. Front row, baby!
Rye: I have been asking myself recently about how to see the ego…
Daniel: See it as it is – an inert object appearing in/to you, awareness. Treat it like an adorable pet, love and discipline being key ingredients.
Rye: Thanks, Daniel. As always, your words have brought me peace and confirmation.
Daniel: You are most welcome.
~ Easy day, Brotherji