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The Fundamental Conflict
Conrad: Hey, Ramji!
I have been wanting to Skype you lately and would love to make a donation but I am pretty low on funds. I do have some questions that I can’t quite rap my head around. Like, I would like to stomp out some psychological problems I have. I am worried this Vedanta stuff will either flourish, as I would potentially be able to see the good as realness of reality more vivid or get tossed in a intense rajasic wave where self-inquiry isn’t too possible.
I recall you saying something like it’s good to be able to take it easy in life for contemplation. (My memory may have messed that up a bit.) I would like to take it easy because all I really want is enough money to stay afloat and have a nice girl. Well, I also desire to put my brain through some kind of good task where my creativity and pattern recognition can be utilized so I think being a psychiatrist would be perfect, but would it? In Jungian psychology they say something like follow your interests and it will help you become the best version of yourself.
College is not a interest though and a very important part of that plan. I also recall hearing something like Vedanta can [get] rid [of] all psychological problems, but is that due to knowing him as the self, the jiva understands he ough to be chill and gets reorganized? Or is it just because no longer he is the doer and the self doesn’t have psychological problems. Because screw psychology if that first ones the case. Ha ha.
I know the idea “I am awesome as I am” but for some reason I can’t scrap the idea a girl would help me feel whole and complete along with money and the reputation for doing something awesome for the world that makes me money. I want to go full send with my Vedanta studies but it seems I must stand up and fight this battle my desires have led me to but the problem is it feels like I am searching for a battle and I am not sure if it exists.
Ramji: Hi, Conrad.
I think it’s best if you forget Vedanta, get a job, a proper education and worry about the girl later. If you are committed to success, a woman will come. But if you are just hanging out in the spiritual world, barely getting by financially with some psychological problems into the bargain, the women will not be interested. If you happen to snag one, however, it won’t stick, because women don’t want to end up fucking you, paying the bills and playing mommy. They want a person who knows what he wants.
Vedanta doesn’t work for psychological problems. You need to be clear about your priorities. It’s clear from this letter that you are not sure if you are a worldly person who wants an easy life with money and a girl or if you want freedom and unconditional self-love. Because you attended so many of my talks, including Trout Lake, it is clear that you have not resolved this material/spiritual conflict, which you need to do for Vedanta to work. If you are clear that your priority is freedom and unconditional self-love, then you start at the bottom, like Arjuna, and do karma yoga. If you had understood this, you would not be writing me this letter. You would be doing what you do with the karma yoga spirit, making the required contributions to yourself and the world and you’d be feeling good about yourself. Maybe you’d even start to attract women! ☺ But you’re not. You’re stuck. And you’re not getting any younger.
Don’t blame yourself for this situation; many young people suffer it. The idea of getting out there in the world and competing with highly educated, motivated, privileged people saps one’s energy and you start to think that there must be an easy way. But just getting by materially and dabbling in spirituality is not a solution. Spirituality only works when you have a burning desire to be free because it is not an easy path. It’s way more than a cool, laid-back lifestyle. There are a lot of young hippie types “hanging out” with Mooji in Portugal seeking God, but “hanging out” there basically involves working like a dog to make Mooji rich and watching all the cute girls lust after Mooji while they shag their way to God with doped-up sexy hippie guys.
So I’d say you’ve soul-searched enough. I’d recommend – well, what I recommended above. At some point your spiritual side will kick in and you will get on the spiritual path properly. I don’t recommend going into psychology, however. People who go into it basically do so to solve the spiritual dilemma that you’re in, and after a lot of hard work, a lot of money down the drain, they get interested in spirituality. If psychology was so wonderful, what’s the interest in spirituality? I’d say a little therapeutic counseling might be a good thing to help you focus on some kind of reasonable work, but it is not going to ultimately solve your spiritual yearning. Studies show that the psychological health of psychological helpers is on a par with the psychological health of the population in general. So don’t look for nirvana – or a good lay – there.
I hope this helps.
~ Much love, Ramji