Annette: Hi, Ram. I have a lot of satori experiences. Every few days another one is popping up. I do a lot of work in between, so that’s why they arise. But when I write those spontaneous verses to you, or the exuberant proclamations of freedom, seeing from the perspective of self, etc., they are during or in the aftermath of a satori. But they don’t last. The weird thing is, they FEEL like they are going to last. I think that part of the nature of satoris is that they contain within them a sense of permanence, like there is no possible way I could ever go back to identifying with the person. But then it’s jarring when the identification with feelings returns. So I’m learning this, understanding there is more of a process, and this is taking time. I know I am the self, and this is the knowledge that informs all my investigation, but the investigation itself is far from over, though sometimes I talk like it is!

James: The apparent permanence of spiritual experience is due to the immediacy of the self. It is for want of self-knowledge, i.e. discrimination, that the experiencer believes the experience should last. You, awareness, are the one there as the inquiry progresses, when the satori happens and when the identity seems to shift back. The knowledge “I am permanent” is awareness, but awareness is the knower. It – you – are free of experience, satoris included.

Annette: GOOOD reminder, thank you so much. Gosh. Even “identifying with the self instead of the person” is an experience. Wow. Even “not mistaking myself to be the person” is an experience.” “Seeing from the perspective of the self” is an experience, arising in me. I remain untouched. Golly gosh, I’m kind of stunned. It gets really subtle, doesn’t it?

About satoris and “seeing from the self” being experiences, appearing in me… duh!… you’ve told me that a thousand times. It takes that many hearings to hear it.

Thank you, Ram. You are a wonderful teacher. I am so glad you my teacher.

~ Love you lots, Annette