This is an email to a decent, intelligent life coach who thinks of himself as a committed seeker of freedom and quite in love with his psychological knowledge but is seemingly unaware of how his shadow self affects his mind. Watered by vanity, “normal” fears and insecurities grow nicely in the shade. More often than not, they manifest as strong opinions, in this case, an argumentative conspiracy-orientated mentality, which doesn’t work well in relationships. Eventually, however, ShiningWorld’s policy supporting masking, social distancing and vaccine mandates caused him to question his relationship to me and our relationship gradually deteriorated.
When I walked away, I predictably joined the ranks of the abusive authoritarians who provide easy hooks on which to hang projections, not that many old white guys are not responsible for a fair share of the world’s miseries. I just don’t happen to be one of them. He attacked me aggressively, which convinced me that letting Maya, an unforgetting taskmaster, teach him was a wise decision.
When you are not working daily on uncomfortable tendencies because you are obsessed with security, pleasure, power, fame, status or virtue, you probably have no real friends because you don’t know how to love.
In the end, the cause of most miseries is a lack of love, which usually starts in childhood because many parents don’t know how to love. They “have” children as one has objects and madly set out to secure the child’s future with “generational wealth”, which translates as neglect here and now. Parents’ primary duty is to model a loving relationship and show unconditional love for their children, which in turn allows children to confidently face life’s innumerable challenges.
Life is only “personal” if you take it personally. There is only one life-threatening virus…ignorance of one’s wholeness…and one reliable vaccine…Self inquiry guided by scripture. What we call people is just blissful existence shining as consciousness momentarily bewitched by Maya. Here’s what I said.
“Dear Self,
If you knew how to love, you would have seen that taking issue with my stance on the vaccine was inappropriate. You would have taken it gladly as Isvara’s grace and learned from it. Karma yoga is a loving conversation with Isvara. Offer your thoughts to Isvara and let Isvara’s revealing words lead you to self-love. If you knew how to love, you would have compassion for that neglected voice inside that is crying for love. What use is a comfortable lifestyle if you don’t know how to love?
If you knew how to love, you would be so fascinated with a rich inner life unfolding within that you would be uninterested in changing the minds of others. People would be attracted to your radiance and would long for the pleasure of your company.
If you knew how to love, your life would be centered around your spirituality, not your spirituality around your life. Only when you get a short break after “a long period of “demanding professional requirements” and “have some breathing space” you would take care of your friends first.
You have studied enough Vedanta. Now study yourself.”
Love,
James