Hey James,
I’ve been mulling over writing to you lately, after more navel gazing of course.
Progressing through life with fairly continuous recognition of awareness as my Self, while simultaneously making zero progress cleaning up Edward’s karma is just not that interesting. Wonder and drudgery at the same time.
So I’ve been composing a letter in my head, trying to figure out how to ask for advice, and trying to figure out how long-winded I need to be explaining the situation before I ask for the advice; really knowing that I just need to continue the minute-by-minute work of getting Edward out of his straitjacket of ugly vasanas.
Then I came across this article which is so beautifully written and I thought you would really like it, so here is the link to that instead. Wow this woman can write! I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
https://www.gq.com/story/mary-h-k-choi-on-family-grief-and-love-modern-lovers
Hi Ed,
Fabulous essay! Very inspirational…the searing self awareness, the love and sensitivity. Thanks.Â
I was thinking about the so-called straight-jacket of your life. Where do you come up with these ideas? The best solution is to love it as it is. There is no reason, apart from the idea that it should be different, that it should be different. Of course you probably get a certain degree of joy thinking that you are a slob, but there’s nothing wrong with you or Matt and his messy karma. Matt’s a thought, karmas a thought. Straight-jacket is a thought.
These words are not etched in granite. There are alternatives…or you can just leave a blank where they once resided. Furthermore, if you insist on negative words, which all boil down to tamas, then surrender to it. It is Isvara…what is. Coming to terms with what is, is the path. You’ve already capitulated so why not acknowledge it?
Here’s a prayer, “Sloth made me do it. Obeisances to you, O Sloth. I’m a slug by no will of my own. Thank you for this identity. Now I can do exactly what I want when I want. Now I can ride the great motorcycle that you gifted me. Great indeed you are, O Sloth.”
Be sure, however, be sure not to slothfully ride your bike. 
Much love,
James
