Dear Sundari,
First of all, THANK YOU so much for that clear email. I am sure I will read it many many times again and again. Yes, I work with the guna book a lot, and now I also have the new book in German language also!
Since 2018 I do a lot to make the changes that are necessary, like sattvic food, exercising, taking long walks, get my sleep rhythm in harmony with night and day. It has really become a war now like in the Bhagavad Gita, I give the tamas a hard time and my rajas is growing, I don’t postpone like before, like you said, I act again, getting rid of the mess and the vasanas that developed with that papaji satsangs and the “I am not the doer trap” I was in for so long.
Sundari Good for you, Stand up and fight! Not paying attention to what is unfolding in our lives is the trademark of tamas, being the energy that clouds the mind. As with all the gunas, it builds on itself, so tamas begets more tamasic tamas, as opposed to sattvic tamas, and it is important to distinguish between the two because the latter is very desirable. With tamasic tamas, the best option is to immediately force yourself to do something rajasic, because you can’t easily get to sattva from deep tamas. Though we can fool ourselves that tamas is sattva when it’s not, nonetheless, sattvic tamas is very pleasant. It’s James’ predominant guna profile jivawise, which is being genuinely chilled and relaxed, as opposed to the dull, lethargic, and heavy slacker energy of pure tamas.
Derek: I also started to stay away from many relationships and persons I was always not happy with and in fact, it was the loneliness that was driving me to get in contact again.
Sundari: To stay with or seek the company of people we don’t even like is a sad statement of how emotionally and spiritually empty we are. And the only reason for doing so is that we are identified with being a person who believes they are incomplete and must have an object to complete them. The entry-level qualification for self-inquiry is that we have understood that the joy is not in the object, that chasing objects for happiness is utterly futile. If we still think the world has something to give us, self-inquiry will not work. As I said in my last email, it’s not that there is anything wrong with relationships or any object. It’s the dependence on them for happiness that is the problem.
Derek: There was a click yesterday, like, what if there is nothing wrong with just being by myself. The thought “there is something wrong to not have friends and be alone” was the one that brings all the pain. I tried to apply what Ramji said, find the thought which makes the problem.
Sundari: Excellent. Self-inquiry is about knowledge in action. We must apply the teachings to our life. The most important are karma yoga and mind management.
Derek: There is nothing wrong to be all to be alone in fact, it is good, I can really dive deep into Vedanta and nobody disturbs me! And It’s not my fault, Ishvara did it, I didn’t choose to be alone. So, I don’t have to take it personally and go into low self-esteem.
Sundari: We are all alone Hendrik, because we are ALL ONE. Being in a relationship cannot heal loneliness. If we chase a relationship to escape our loneliness, we simply make it worse. No object can give us what we seek, which is fullness, because all objects are value-neutral. They can make us ‘happy’ for a short while, but not permanently. The only happiness that lasts is the knowledge that you are what you seek. The joy is never in the object, NEVER!
Hendrik: And when I will get more and more sattva, the right people will also come naturally, because reality is nondual. There is no separation between me and so-called “others”, if reality is really non-dual.
Sundari: There is no separation between you and so-called others, true. You cannot ‘get more sattva’ because sattva is the true nature of the mind. But when the mind is taken over by rajas and tamas, then it seems like we do not have any sattva. Mind management is about bringing rajas and tamas into balance with sattva so that we can benefit from the positive side of rajas and tamas. All the gunas have upsides and downsides, even sattva. James’ book on the gunas explains this clearly.
Hendrik: I accepted now that my svardharma is Vedanta inquiry, especially karma yoga, and to train my body in qigong (I taught 25 years tai chi and qigong in Munich) to get good health again, and I accept the job as prasad from Ishvara to bring me money, a place to sleep and food. As I see it, it is also good to develop titiksha, and the job is a good training for that. And I have become very good in Titiksha. The job has also an upside, not only a downside. It’s also a possibility to get rid of my likes and dislikes and give up my selfishness.
That what is in front of me now is to take care of my health and do the job with the spirit of karma yoga, there is the knowledge that something different will come when the time is right. And I am not passive, I always look out for possibilities, which jobs are around, what kind of activities I would love to do, and I am also in the process of building a new website and start teaching qigong classes in Berlin. Corona came along at exactly the moment when I was planning a new class last year, and then everything was blocked by the power of Ishvara in the form of a virus.
Sundari: Excellent. We must understand what the Field is asking of us and adapt to what is possible and necessary always, especially in these difficult times. To do so is common sense, to go against this is futile and the cause of suffering. It sounds like you have many valuable talents and abilities which will find a new way to express themselves. Life is a constant process of adapting to Isvara.
Derek: Thank you so much for that reply, its deep, and it’s a lot, so I will read it again and again carefully and take all the points to my heart. And thanks for the document, it’s great!
Sundari: You are welcome, apologies for the delay in replying to you, we have been very busy lately.
Derek: There is a deep value now for iron-hard discipline, it makes me feel so good to really be a disciplined acting person, making intelligent use of my free will. There is definitive free will, maybe limited, but free will is there.Â
Sundari: Yes, we do have free will as jivas or it would not be possible to achieve anything. But ultimately, we know that as everything is Isvara and given to us, so the main thing is to hand over our life to Isvara in trust and act accordingly. When we trust Isvara, everything works out. Being disciplined means being a disciple unto oneself, the Self. It is not about forcing the mind to do what it does not want to do, though it may require that sometimes to get out of tamas. It is the wise way to respond to the logic of Existence, in every moment of every day, thought by thought.
Derek: For me, speaking as a jiva, the “I am not the doer story” is finished thanks to Ramjis Vedanta. I am a doer again now, more than 100%!Â
Sundari: We will all be doers until the moment we close our eyes for the last time in this life. There is no way to change that. Karma yoga sannyas is about negating the idea of doership, not the actual doing. This positively affects what and how we do what we do, but that does not necessarily mean we mean we change what we do unless it is adharmic.
Much Love,
Sundari
